Whoa Julie, take a deep breath. Okay, the calendar is showing we’ve just started enjoying the delights of Autumn with its cooler nights, crisp mornings and the summer harvest coming to its end; so where did summer go? What happened to my best made plans? Looking back, I could easily throw a tantrum, disappointed that I did not “achieve” what I thought I should or must achieve. Screaming and stamping my feet may make me feel good for the duration of that vocal and movement expression, but what then….? The fact remains my plans were hijacked by forces beyond my control, as well as my own fears and procrastination – and I either had to acknowledge that shit happens or continue ranting and raving about how things don’t turn out the way I want them to.
Thankfully I know the pros and cons of throwing a tantrum. Recalling distant childhood memories when my parents would leave me to ‘it’, coming to the realization I wasn’t going to get what I wanted, drying my tears and carrying on with my day, eventually forgetting what all the fuss was about. Yup, releasing the frustration, anger and disappointment feels good, right? Pro – tick. But in the end no amount of cursing or throwing yourself on the floor kicking and screaming is going to change where you find yourself. Con – tick. (No I didn’t replay my younger self behaviour!) Soooo, the choice? Now all grown up, I chose to accept what was happening and got on with it.
Over the years, through countless life situations beyond my control, it has become easier to call on the resilience I’ve come to know resides within me, within reach. Accept, get on with life, and well, maybe there are better things unfolding for me that are beyond my control.
You may be wondering what some of my (perceived) failures were. Well, my lack of interest in writing blogs for one thing – I ran out of words, summer life overtook me which was great, but I felt I was failing the commitment I had made to myself when I took my website live. And another was marking-time organizing summer workshops and promoting of my retreat – yup procrastination and fear. And the biggie, was making the decision to cancel my retreat after altering its focus, being forced to change the venue and dealing with cancellations. In my mind a big, fat failure. But something was unfolding beyond my control. Within a week an email landed with details of a yoga training to be held at the same time my retreat would have run. And the training? Amazing, life changing, perfectly timed….but that is another blog!
While summer hasn’t played out as I expected, the momentum that I’ve felt building since winter in Perth (of self study) has lead me to where I now find myself in early Autumn. I’m content and loving life….just going with the ebb and flow of life, and happy to have kicked off Autumn with a Myofascia Release Workshop.
Lesson learnt - tantrums are for children….!